Things Not to Post

Recently on Facebook, people have been posting lists with titles like, “Things Not to Say to Pregnant Women,” “Things Not to Say to People Who Don’t Want Children,” “Things NOT to Say to Your Biracial Coworkers,” etc. In fact, type “Things Not to Say” into Google and you’ll think to yourself, “I must never talk to anyone ever again.”

Of course, I’ve said some of those things to people. Who hasn’t? I had the same woman on two different occasions say to me while I was pregnant (in her defense, I had cut and colored my hair after the first encounter), “Wow, you look like you’re about to pop!” It was annoying. Even at the time I delivered at 38 weeks, I never looked “pop”able. And while this phrase was, for sure, included in that first list, I figured she meant no harm. I’m sure this was just her go-to, casual, small-talk phrase she said to every woman with a distended abdomen.

And that’s just it, people mean no harm – no one intends to offend anyone. I know sitcom writers like to make their characters edgy and abrupt because it makes for more interesting dialogue, but people in real life are almost always kind (to people’s faces; what’s said behind closed doors need not be factored in my argument).

Among my list of “Things Not to Do on Facebook,” I’m going to add sharing “Lists of Things that Make Your Friends Feel Like Huge Jerks.” (For a more comprehensive list of “Things Not to Do on Facebook,” be on the lookout, for I may write it down one of these days in order to unleash some pent up aggression.)